The Anniversary Time Capsule
Don't Open Until 2055
We have now arrived at The Insider, the final story in this magazine. This is my figurative 40 acres of real estate where Your Humble Correspondent hopefully writes something memorable, informative or funny — and usually fails by all metrics. Why should this month be any different?
Regardless, our topic du jour should be fairly obvious. Being the final word of our 70th anniversary issue, I think it’s wholly appropriate to use these last pages to bring down the curtain on our big Happy Birthday party.
The Rearview Mirror
Don’t worry, this is not going to be one last mucoidal wad of hoopla as I think we’ve had plenty of self-congratulations by this point. When we started discussing ideas for this issue, former Publisher Roy Huntington offered one important insight — readers will quickly tire of too much “Hooray for us!” so we needed to avoid it. This is why I focused on all the great stuff we’ve offered over the years and how it relates to our readers, rather than name-dropping the world-class writers and shooters who have graced our magazine.
And now we’re officially done looking backward. I like to keep my “good-byes” simple and short so there are none of the awkward pauses and pointless promises a long-drawn-out parting often brings. Leaving someone or something, whether for a few hours or the rest of your life, is best handled by saying whatever needs to be said, tipping your hat and riding off into the sunset. I know — I grew up watching too many westerns, but it still seems to work well in practice. Thus we’ve now officially shut the door on yesterday, which leaves the present or future as possible topic fodder.
Regarding today … well, I don’t want to be a pessimist or spoil sport but our 2025 societal situation isn’t exactly one I’d hold up as a rockin’ great party, so let’s scratch “current events” off our list. This only leaves the misty horizons of tomorrow.
This being an anniversary issue, I realized there is a better-than-normal chance somebody will look up these words in the future, much like I did while compiling this issue. Therefore I decided this edition of The Insider would best serve as the official GUNS 70th Anniversary time capsule.
As to contents, your typical time capsule contains present-day items to give future generations an idea of what life was like “way back when.” In our case, the magazine itself serves as a good resource so we’ll move onto the other common feature of many time capsules — predictions for the future.
Given I have prime box seats to the firearms industry plus a keen sense of history, I’ll offer my thoughts on what I think the world of shooting will look like in 30 years as they celebrate the 100th anniversary of GUNS. Assuming we haven’t yet blown up the planet with nukes or been baked alive from climate change due to cow flatulence and Styrofoam coolers, I only hope the future generation uses this information to better understand the current ethos and appreciate our outlook. And in case any of those future people are wondering — No, I don’t have a gas leak in my office. There are several open tubes of model airplane glue, but no gas leak.
The Predictions
Future Guns — Firearms of the future will undoubtedly be based on some type of electronic technology, lasers or some other heretofore undiscovered directed energy transfer method. These guns will be 100% effective, selectable as to the desired terminal effects, clean, inexpensive, easy to use and completely restricted to government-only use after the 2034 election.
Meanwhile, those of us clinging to our guns and Bibles will continue clinging. Remington Arms will have been sold another 153 times and end up being owned by Apple. Springfield Armory will have set a record by unveiling 116,000 different firearms models in a single year while S&W will still have the ugly lock on the side of their revolvers. Sometime around 2035, I predict Ruger will buy Microsoft.
Rifles will commonly weigh under 2 lbs. and shoot .25 MOA out of the box, while handguns will come from the manufacturer equipped with an incredible array of high-tech accessories, government-mandated safeties and a suppressor. The average CCW pistol will tip the scales at around 7 lbs. and have an OAL of approximately 24″.
Future Ammunition — Assuming we’re still using actual bullets and powder, ammunition choices will continue to proliferate in extremis. Exotic materials and new technology will make it even more difficult to choose the best load:
“Hmmmm, lemme see. The deer I’m hunting, codenamed Alpha-1.5T-ECHO, weighs between 180 and 202 lbs. and favors his front left hoof according to my trail cam drone advanced sensor payload. The A.I. hunting prediction computer says I should get a 214-yard shot at him quartering away next Tuesday around sunset. For nostalgia, I’ll go with one of my grandad’s ancient Model 70s in .30-06. I could pick up a box of the Winchester UltraNuke Depleted Uranium 8,000-grainers or maybe the Federal (‘Brought to you by TikTok’) Radar-Intercept Sabot 50-grain directed-energy plasma bullet …”
Likewise, developments in shotgun cartridges mean the .410 eventually will be considered a “big bore” to be used exclusively for things like bear defense, while new guns such as the ultra-lightweight Ithaca .25-caliber side-by-side shotgun will be the most popular choice for upland hunters.
There will also be the continued unrestrained development of new rifle and pistol cartridges. For example, long-range shooters will someday work themselves into a froth on the internet while engaged in endless arguments as to which Creedmoor cartridge is the best for long-range shots — the original iconic 6.5 Creed, the new and improved 6.6 Creedmoor, the revolutionary 6.65 Creedmoor, the game-changing 6.67 Creedmoor or the tack-driving 6.705 Creedmoor. Wildcatters will further experiment with cartridges in between these factory loadings. Berger (owned by Elon Musk) will announce Very Very Very Very Really Freakin’ Low Drag (VVVVRFLD) bullets with a G7 Ballistic Coefficient approaching 8×10 (-2). These have been known to speed up in flight during times of high sunspot activity.
Optics — Every gun in the future will come with some type of optic installed and most will have video recording capability. In fact, in the future it will be nearly impossible to buy a gun, automobile, refrigerator or pair of shoes that isn’t equipped with a red dot optic (and it goes without saying — a Picatinny rail).
In the future, the quality of the video recording made by the optic or weapon itself will be a key purchase decision. The better firearms optics will not only calculate windage, elevation and spindrift but overlay weather radar, pick up local television broadcasts, have a full-featured internet browser and receive 400 different pornography channels. Some will even make Julienne fries for that post-hunt cookout.
Gun Magazines — I’m not talking about how you feed your gun, I’m talking about this thing in your hand made of dead trees that feeds your mind. As I’ve said countless times, I’m bullish on the magazine format so I believe they’ll still be around in some form, just as there are still steam locomotives and paddlewheel riverboats. Granted, most of those are abandoned and rusting away somewhere but there are a few working examples.
Of course, the content of shooting magazines will change over time since young people no longer want to write about guns anymore. The gun magazine of the future will likely just reprint press releases from manufacturers mixed with other articles focusing on makeup tips and beard grooming for a YouTube Channel or podcast appearances. As everyone in the future will have their own “platform” and “Brand” regardless if they have anything important or factual to say, looking good will be far more valuable and respected than actual wisdom or facts.
Hmmmm, that sounds familiar.
So, I guess what I’m saying is — we’ve already seen the future.
And, frankly, I’m not impressed. That’s why I’m making plans to hitch a ride into the sunset on the next passing steamboat. Good luck in 2055!
